Most best advice raising children
First, you need to immediately say the most important thought: Your child is not so strongly influenced by your parenting principles gleaned from books. The strongest influence on the child is the very structure of your personality. This idea is repeated by many psychologists. I will cite it in the statement of Eric Erickson: For a child, our individual actions are not so important, he is primarily concerned about our position in life: whether we live as loving, helping each other and firm in their convictions, or something makes us angry, anxious, internally divided. In fact, the best thing that parents could do to fully develop their children is to work on their neuroses and increase the fullness of their own lives. Therefore, let's understand that parents are not only engaged in raising children, with "out of nowhere" psychological problems. Parents receive information from their children, both from indicators, and about their own psychological distress... Therefore, reasonable parents are engaged in, among other things, work with their own psychological trauma. It is believed that the wisest thing to do is to direct your pedagogical potential towards yourself.
The best gift we can give a child is not so much to love him as to teach him to love himself. Jacques Salomé. And for this, the parents themselves need to improve their ability to love. The ability to love, as you remember, helps to love both yourself and the people around you.
The stubborn child is the result of the mother's unreasonable behavior. Janusz Korczak.So that parents can mentally educate healthy child and apply the rules of practical psychology, they themselves must first learn to accept themselves, become self-confident, calm, relaxed internally. If this does not happen, almost everything good rules will break about the lack of emotional warm relationships. There will be no opportunities for dialogue in which almost all emerging problems can be solvedwhen people live nearby, not trying to manipulate each other. A child feels good next to calm, happy parents, he has the opportunity to be himself and feel good at the same time, directing energy to master the world and achieve.
Come up with a few activities with your child or a few family activities, traditions that will create a zone of joy. Make some of these activities or activities regular so that the child will wait for them and know that they will definitely come unless he does something very bad. Cancel them only if a really tangible misconduct has occurred. The best punishment for a child is to deprive him of what is good, not make him bad. Julia Gippenreiter. To avoid unnecessary conflicts, balance your own desires with the capabilities of the child. All parents have their own expectations about their children, this is normal, just do not "raise the bar" too high. When a child learns something new, comprehends unusual activities and acquires new skills, parents need to be patient and understand that mistakes and falls are inevitable. It is impossible to allow the accumulation of negative emotions around the activity to which the parents want to involve the child. Most of all, this item concerns study and preparation of lessons. The fact is that in everything related to school and lessons, either parents or teachers make decisions for the child. He has absolutely no choice, and learning for him is constant coercion, failure, mistakes, bad grades, abuse and punishment, in a word, negative emotions that accumulate. Self-esteem suffers from experiences of failure. And these are the cases when they say "beat off the hunt." Allow your child to play the game and learn from their mistakes. It is about stopping unnecessary worries (putting away toys, waking up in the morning, checking lessons). It is necessary to gradually shift responsibility for your deeds and actions to the child. This will allow him to develop organization and confidence in himself. Of course, at first you will have to sacrifice some comfort and well-being, but, oddly enough, negative experiences for a child are also very important. As a result, he grows up and becomes independent. Life sometimes teaches better than a parent. And when a child is punished for wrong actions "by life itself", then it is not worth adding parental admonitions. It is important to treat with understanding and compassion for the child's experiences, and not "add fuel to the fire." But you should not insure your child against the negative consequences of his own actions (of course, if they do not pose a threat to life and health). For him, this is a valuable experience and the cultivation of consciousness in himself.
Children who are not loved become adults who cannot love. Pearl Buck.
Educators focus their attention on the shortcomings, shortcomings of the educated, thereby wishing to help them. At the same time, there is a lot of good in him, and the parents know about this, but they don't tell the baby, they don't tell him what is good in him and what he does well. Gradually, the child gets the impression that they do not like him, that they are unhappy with him, that he is not appreciated, etc. And after all, we all experienced all this. Guided by good intentions, our parents constantly pointed out to us what was bad in us. And therefore, instead of positive reinforcements, we constantly received negative ones. We lacked praise and affection, and when we grew up, when society's demands on us increased, we were completely deprived of such reinforcements. The emphasis is always on the disadvantages, and we generally talk very little about the merits. With a lack of positive reinforcements, with an excess of prodding and condemnation, the child gradually develops a feeling that he is really unworthy of anything good, that he is "bad", that he is "worthless," "not capable of anything." Therefore, he begins to scold himself, prod, condemn and punish himself. We become our own examiners and censors, biased and sometimes even cruel. (Andrey Kurpatov. A remedy for depression)
Undoubtedly accepting a child means loving him not because he is handsome, smart, capable, an excellent student, an assistant, and so on, but simply because he is! Julia Gippenreiter
At the very beginning of our life, each of us is like a flower bud - just as closed. Only after the bud receives heat from the sun's rays and nourishment from the soil will it open and all the beauty of the flower hidden in it will become visible. In the same way, from the very beginning of life, a human person needs the warmth of human love and nourishment, that is, parental care, in order to open up and discover all the unique beauty that God has put into every person. We are all the works of those who love us or deny us love. John Powell.
Do not interfere with the business that the child is busy with if he does not ask for help. With your non-interference you will inform him: “You are all right! Of course you can handle it! " If it is difficult for a child and he is ready to accept your help, be sure to help him. At the same time, take on only what he cannot do himself, leave the rest to him to do. As your child learns new actions, gradually transfer them to him. Julia Gippenreiter.
Wrong and unwanted feelings of the child.
It is important that the child has the right to show anger and other feelings that we believe are wrong. Here psychological literacy is needed in the parent, who himself would have dealt with his suppressed feelings, his right to experience any emotions and feelings. Then the adult will be able to correct not the child's feelings themselves, but their external manifestation. But, alas, adults cannot always hear the child, bumping into their irritation and other feelings that arise at this moment. To help parents deal with their wrong feelings, we.
Parents bring up, and children are brought up by family lifethat folds up intentionally or unintentionally. The life of the family is strong because its impressions are constant, everyday, that it acts imperceptibly, strengthens or poisons the human spirit, like the air that we live by. A. Ostrogorsky. Even while fulfilling many of the modern parenting rules, it is difficult for a parent to apply many of these rules if he has not experienced them the hard way. Secondly, the fulfillment of even such wonderful rules can give the child not happiness, but mental loneliness. The fact is that a parent, even if he manages to follow the rules, cannot do them sincerely, spontaneously, feel free and relaxed with the child. The result of such "correct" behavior can, of course, be that the child will receive less criticism and rejection expressed in words, but will catch the inner tension and emotional detachment of a loved one.
What if the child rolls historians?
The fact is that the child does not yet know how to suppress his feelings and by such manifestations shows that something is wrong with him, he feels some discomfort. In a small child, any psychological or physical discomfort turns into crying, and if the parents react incorrectly, into hysteria. You will need inner calmness (which does not mean the absence of negative feelings at all), a calm voice, confidence in the fairness of your requirements and consistency in setting boundaries to the child.
It is very useful after a tantrum, in a calm state, to discuss what happened with the child. Only in a calm and comfortable state is the child able to rethink his behavior and draw conclusions that will help him regulate his own behavior. Don't expect quick results, but this is the right strategy.
Note that overly anxious parents have overly anxious children. It's not that it is inherited. Although, the role of heredity is very strong in the transmission of the properties and type of the nervous system. But anxiety is an acquired quality, it is not inherited. Why then do anxious mothers have anxious children, and life-loving mothers have life-loving children? Excessive anxiety is just an inability to deal with your feelings, the wrong answer to ordinary life situations. So, growing up to the correct answer is not easy. And children grow up only to what those who are engaged in their upbringing could grow up to. It is useless to say, "There is nothing to worry about." These are frequent words of anxious parents trying to silence their anxiety. This is their only way to deal with anxiety. And the way is wrong. Therefore, the same wrong way is adopted by their children.
You can express your dissatisfaction with individual actions of the child, but not with the child as a whole. You can condemn the child's actions, but not his feelings, no matter how undesirable or inappropriate they may be. Dissatisfaction with the child's actions should not be systematic, otherwise it will develop into rejection of him. Julia Gippenreiter.
The child is the mirror of the family; just as the sun is reflected in a drop of water, so the moral purity of mother and father is reflected in children. Vasily Alexandrovich Sukhomlinsky.
In the comments to this article, over time, other useful points of the rules for raising children will be posted.
, Psychology of love. Psychologist's site about the art of love.Raising children is a difficult task that lasts from the moment a child arrives in your family. Sometimes the behavior of their beloved child puts loving parents into a dead end, and it seems that there is simply no way out of this situation. However, there is always a way out, you just need to think about your actions in relation to the child, analyze the behavior of your child, find out why he is unbearably behaving, try to look at the problems of education through the eyes of a child.
Parents should know the basics of child psychology
Communication between parents and a child plays an important role in education. Many experts claim that this is the most important and efficient wayto influence childhood on behavior and character, which in the future will play a great role in the formation of personality and outlook on the life of children in the future.
Trust between parents and children Below are the articles on the topic "child psychology", "parenting", which should be familiar to all parents in order not to make mistakes in raising a child.
What is child psychology - definition
An article on how to calm children down in times of conflict
Most parents have no idea how to convince a child to be calm, how to find an approach in childhood with their child.
Raising children into adolescence is a headache for many parents. The child's psychology changes dramatically, his mood often changes. A few minutes ago, communication with the child's parents was very happy, he told the adults about his studies, his achievements and his life in society, and after a while the child seemed to be replaced. He begins to be capricious, demanding to buy him expensive things or asks for a night walk. Do not be intimidated by this behavior, since the child's psyche is changing, this is considered normal behavior in children.
What to do in case of a conflict? Keep calm At such a rather childhood age, children themselves understand on a subconscious level that they are behaving incorrectly. But still, the stubborn character and stubbornness of the child takes up above the mind. Usually in such a situation, parents give up, referring to a difficult age. Sometimes they make mistakes in education, showing their weakness, yielding to the whims of a teenager. The worst thing is when adults break down due to stress and raise their voice to the child.
A radical change in the mood of children, disgusting behavior in childhood can drive anyone crazy, even the most balanced educators.
Childhood negativism is temporary To avoid quarrels, you need to follow a number of rules:
- If your child has uncontrollable behavior, try to take matters into your own hands. Give him more time, do his favorite things with him;
- Psychology articles talk about the importance of free time for children. Give him a break from everyone and be alone, take care of his worries and affairs;
- If you still broke off and yelled at your children, then you need to correct the situation as soon as possible. When the situation calms down a little, the child's psyche will return to normal, you should explain your behavior.
Punishing a child should not be scary or inadequate An article telling about how to act if children have frequent tantrums and endless whims
The psychology of children is arranged in such a way that they try in every possible way to please their relatives, to please them. They adore increased attention to themselves, they want to feel care, love and warmth.
Based on this, we can say that there are no so-called difficult children, there are only not very attentive parents.
Children throw tantrums at any age and even with the most ideal parents. This is unlikely to be avoided. The child's psyche is disturbed when he begins to show pronounced anger. He can roll on the floor, stomp his feet, throw things around, and even try to fight his parents.
Causes of children's whims In raising a child, it is important to understand the reason for such whims and try to fight them, because they inhibit the development of children, contribute to the fact that the baby becomes a selfish person. The psyche of children needs treatment. The most effective measure to combat this behavior in childhood is to ignore the child's demands. You can take this behavior with humor, hug your child. Stay balanced, the most important thing is not to get nervous. Over time, he will realize that his destructive behavior will lead nowhere.
If your child is hysterical in a crowded place, such as a shopping center, and you don't want to sort things out with him in front of strangers, take him out into the fresh air in a calm place.
There, a child can be capricious and cry as much as he wants. The child's psyche should calm down if he throws out all the anger out.
How to respond to the whims of children - tips At a time when the children are in a capricious mood, it will not be possible to talk to him. After the child's condition improves, it is worth having a conversation with him. Tell him that his behavior is very upsetting you, you cannot be so capricious about every little thing. Tell him that in the future you hope that the baby will behave more sensibly. Make it clear to the child that you will love him no matter what. The psychology of children is arranged in such a way that after this heart-to-heart conversation, the baby will wake up a feeling of guilt.
The main rule is to always remain calm and do not pay attention to his provocation.
An article on how to properly encourage a child so as not to spoil him
When the children are 3 years old, he is already well adapted to the world around him. They start to think about what they are doing. Basically, all their actions are aimed at attracting the attention of their parents. He does not always manage to achieve what he wants by behaving approximately. Sometimes the psyche of the child understands that bad behavior is the right step towards attracting the attention of adults. You should not immediately scold a child if he has done a bad deed. Better analyze your actions.
How to reward your child - tips Most children at this age behave in an impulsive manner. He can laugh and play calmly, and after a minute he starts crying for no apparent reason. At an early age, babies do not yet know how to control their behavior. Parents should not forget about this. If he does not fulfill the requests of adults, for example, does not put away his toys, he does not demonstrate his harmful character, but is simply busy with his own important affairs. So far, he still does not know how to immediately think about his actions. The correct reaction of parents in this situation affects the future development of the child.
Types of family rewards The formation of a child's personality, a healthy and strong psyche of a baby, largely depends on the attitude of parents towards him, as well as the time spent on games in childhood, and the reaction of adults to the child's bad behavior.
Praising and encouraging children correctly during parenting
It is important for parents not only to punish their child for bad behavior and actions, but also to praise. It is necessary to learn how to praise a child correctly so that he does good deeds afterwards. If you constantly tell the child about how good he is at every opportunity, the child will cease to like it. He will take such eulogies from adults for granted. Therefore, it is necessary to praise your child only for a job well done, for all possible help to adults, useful actions that he performed, spending his personal time on it. Of course, you should compliment him, tell him that he did well, that his parents appreciate him very much, but do not overdo it.
On reward and punishment - when and how to apply Praising children is only worth it. In this case, you should talk to him as sincerely as possible, so that he will forever understand that doing good deeds for good is great.
You can respond to positive actions from a child by presenting him welcome gifts... In this case, also, do not forget about the sense of proportion. As a gift, you can use not only sweets and expensive gadgets. Trips to the circus, theater or cinema will bring joy and vivid emotions to the little man. Mom can bake goodies with her daughter for a mini-party. It will be much more interesting than just buying a candy in a store, besides, the joint actions of an adult and a baby will unite the family and help to better understand children, influence their character.
We need to pamper children A number of mistakes parents make when raising their children
Sometimes parents insist on their own, forcing them to do things that the child does not like. “Do what you are asked, otherwise your parents will stop loving you” - you can often hear such words from tortured parents when a child resists and does not want to fulfill the requirements of adults. In the opinion of adults, it is useless to persuade a child in something and talk heart to heart with them. He still doesn't give in to persuasion.
Advice for parents from a psychologist Let's listen to the opinion of psychologists on the words of parents "if you do not fulfill my request, then I will stop loving you." According to experts, children take such a threat very seriously.
- First, cheating is not the best method of pressure on a child. And this threat is just a deception.
- Secondly, such a statement is unlikely to have a positive effect on your baby. Better not to deceive your child. Try to replace this threatening phrase with another, for example this one: "I will always love you, but I don't like your behavior, it makes me very sad."
Parental support is the most important thing for a child Another not very good phrase that is applied to children in order to reason with him: “I am much older than you, I am a dad (mom). It won't matter what I say. " Many adults believe that being strict with the younger generation is the best parenting option. Parents are much older and more experienced than their children, so they are always right. If you indulge a small person, then he will finally "sit down" on his head and will not fulfill requests from adults.
And what will experts in child psychology say to this? When completing an assignment from adults to children, motivation is important, he must know that his efforts will be properly rewarded. The little person needs to be convinced that he is not trying in vain. If you treat children too strictly, this can lead to a situation where the child will obey and fulfill your requests only in your presence. But when there is no one at home, the baby will engage in sabotage, doing everything to upset the parents. A strict attitude is of course necessary, but do not go too far. In the event that you do not have time to persuade the child, promise that you will definitely reward him for the work later, in the event that he does all the work.
Once a woman came to a psychologist and asked a question:
Tell me, at what age do you need to start raising a child?
How old is he now? The psychologist asked.
So, you are exactly 2.5 years late.
This short but very instructive story concerns almost every mother. From our very birth, our parents dreamed of making us full-fledged personalities. And now we, ourselves, being parents, are thinking how to raise a wonderful child?
There are no uniform rules in education. Each nation, culture, tribal community and individual family has its own traditions of upbringing, which are invariably copied and passed down through the generation. In other words, the upbringing that was invested in you and me is the consequences of how our great-great-grandmothers and grandfathers were brought up. However, modern mothers are increasingly looking for progressive ways of solving the issue of raising a strong and independent personality in a child. In this regard, the question of how to properly raise a child requires careful consideration.
How not to bring up children?
Let's start with negative examples. Unfortunately, all generations of parents have made certain mistakes, trying to raise a new generation by their own example. Let's break down these mistakes so that we never make them.
How not to raise children:
- Remember - your child is a separate person. Do not expect him to become the same as you, and do not demand it from him. There are plenty of examples of how parents who did not realize their life plans ruined the destinies of their own children.
- Don't take fatigue, resentment, and irritation out of your child. As a result, you run the risk of getting a depressed person, insecure and frustrated in life.
- Don't laugh at your child's fears or scare them yourself. Forever forget phrases like: "If you behave badly, I will give you to that uncle over there." What seems funny to adults is a real tragedy for a child. In order not to grow up a neurasthenic in your own home, teach your child not to be afraid and to be able to deal with fears.
- Do not prevent your child from doing what he likes. Let it be a constructor, a young mechanic's circle, or something that does not fit in with your ideas about how your child should be. Do not forget that he is a separate person with his own interests, and you have no right to dictate your terms to him.
- Don't criticize. If instead of supporting and strengthening faith in yourself, you will smash the child with criticism and discontent, as a result, you risk getting a gray personality with a huge inferiority complex.
There are a huge number of examples on the topic of "how not to". And it's better if you never come across these examples. It is much more important in the early stages of your child's development to find an answer to the question of how to raise a child without punishment and make him a real person?
The formation of a person's personality is a long process, it can be influenced until a person turns 23 years old. However, the foundation of all education is laid before the age of four. As a rule, everything that you managed to invest in your child before the age of four will end up in his mature age.
To provide your children with psychological health, you need to fully satisfy the child's need for play with adults:
- With kids from one to 1.5 years, do object games (rattles, stuffed Toys, nesting dolls, games with a shovel in the sandbox).
- In the period from 1.5 to 3 years, role-playing games (putting the doll to bed, feeding the mother, etc.) will be more suitable.
- Children from 3 years old and older will gladly accept role-playing games (playing in the hospital, shopping, visiting toys, etc.).
Discipline plays a huge role in the correct upbringing of babies. Here you will be helped by knowledge of how to raise a child without screaming:
Finally, the most main secrethow to raise a child correctly - every day instill in your child faith in yourself. He needs your support every minute of his life. Remember the phrases: “I believe in you”, “I am proud of you”, “You can do it”, and then, hearing them from the most dear and beloved people, your child will grow up to be a strong, self-confident and purposeful person.
- the moment is exciting and, perhaps, the most long-awaited for parents. With the advent of children, their life changes dramatically and takes on a different meaning, and all forces are directed to upbringing and providing better life offspring. That is why parents have a great responsibility, because they are the ones who form the character of the little person. And it is very important to take the issue of education seriously, because it depends on how happy the child will grow up. How can you educate your children in order to protect them from unnecessary complexes and self-doubt? What should be given to a child from birth so that he goes through life with a feeling of happiness and harmony, and what mistakes do parents most often make in raising children? To get answers to these difficult questions, we turned to a psychologist Sofya Charysheva.
SOFIA CHARYSHEVA, psychologist, senior researcher at the Department of Psychological Assistance, Faculty of Psychology, Moscow State University Lomonosov, Ph.D.
Raising children is a whole science and quite a responsible business.Children, as a rule, copy the behavior model of their parents, so they can only be brought up by their own example.
Categorically important mistake in raising children is that parents do not perceive the child as a person who is unique in their talents and needs, they are often compared with someone and confuse concepts such as "care" and "Education".
In general, there are three stages of a child's development: from birth to five years old, where the baby's world is continuous Disneyland, he is the king in it, if it is a boy, and a princess, if it is a girl. Then from five to 11 years old, where the child becomes a student and his Disneylandfaces a different social environment, parents need to help him figure it out and maximize his interest in studying. From about 11 years old, the most difficult period for both the child and the parent begins, where hormones rule. The main thing here is to remain a friend for the child, to help him realize his new boundaries, be patient and wait until everything is working out.
It is important for parents to catch the moment of transition from one age to another in time and change their role in communication in a timely manner, to be aware of everything that interests the child at every stage.It is extremely important at all stages of a child's development to talk a lot and be interested in what he wants, what he likes and what he does not like, what he thinks and what he feels, and, of course, always give him a choice or at least create the illusion of choice.
In order for a child to grow up as a full-fledged person at all stages of development, it is extremely important to always try to find time to listen to him and take his opinion into account. It is also vital to give the child the dose of love and attention he needs, because a full-fledged person, first of all, is filled with the value of himself, and an unloved child devotes his entire subsequent life to seeking love and recognition from other people.
How to raise a child correctly is difficult to answer unequivocally, because there is no ideal strategy for raising the future generation. All babies have personality from birth. Young princesses and little gentlemen are all different. Some crumbs are thoughtful and calm, others are amusing curious, others are disobedient fidgets, and the fourth are reserved and silent. Therefore, the tactics of the educational process cannot be the same. Only the mother knows the character of the baby. And therefore, it is she who must choose the techniques that are ideal for her baby. Psychologists can only outline a general strategy and recommend how you do not need to act in order to fence a fragile young psyche from traumatic factors.
How to raise children correctly - psychology
In order for the baby to grow and form correctly, parents need to organize suitable conditions for this. First of all, for the baby for a comprehensive harmonious development parental love and caring attitude is needed. When a baby feels indifference from a significant adult, fertile soil is created for the emergence of a huge number of problems. This is not exclusively about behavioral deviations. The occurrence of a health disorder is also real.
Sometimes it happens that significant adults love the child, but the baby does not feel it. Therefore, it is necessary to demonstrate love to the crumbs by any available means, hug them, talk about your own feelings, kiss. The child must feel unconditionality parental love, understand that parents will love him in spite of everything and will always help.
Most parents are interested in how to raise a child correctly, because the future existence of their child depends on it.
In the first turn, your little one should be taken completely, despite the apparent shortcomings. Many parents make an almost irreparable mistake in trying to fit a baby to their own ideal of a human subject. And when you can't do it, you feel disappointed. The child always feels parental disapproval, understands that they do not believe in him, that he could not live up to parental expectations. As a result, the crumbs suffer, which gives rise to many problems.
Your child, whether a three-year-old or a teenager, needs support when he needs it. Children should understand that in any difficult situation, they can always rely on their parents. It is parents who instill a sense of security in their own children.
It is not recommended to scare children with various popular horror stories. For example, when, for educational purposes, significant adults frighten a baby that if he behaves badly, a babayka will come and take him away, the child understands what was said literally. He thinks that some scary person will enter the house, and his parents will let the babayka take him away. Hence a feeling of insecurity arises, the authority of the parents falls. The kid stops feeling safe.
You should be more interested in the life of the child, talk on various topics with him, especially those that interest the baby himself, often spend leisure time together, doing pleasant activities for both. A joint pastime filled with bright positive emotions contributes to the emergence of friendly interaction between adults and kids.
You need to respect your own child, you should not dismiss the words of the crumbs, from his opinion. Phrases of the type: “don’t be smart”, “little more tips to distribute” are not allowed. It is necessary to praise the offspring for even the smallest successes.
In order to teach a child something, it is necessary to take into account one children's feature - kids brilliantly remember everything that interests them. Therefore, there is no reason to hammer knowledge into the child, it is better to make the classes interesting for him, and also that they include playful moments.
Do not overuse the notation. After all, they are boring and completely uninteresting to the baby. It is better to demonstrate the desired behavior by your own actions. Children always take the actions of their parents as a model.
How to properly raise a child from birth
It is better to start the educational process from the first decades of the baby's life. The active development of the crumbs occurs just in the first year of their existence. At this stage, they adapt to the environment and gain the first valuable experience. After all, in just 12 months, a baby needs to learn to gag, smile, react to parental voices, mood, and distinguish intonations.
Often, parents of babies pay more attention to following the daily routine and diet, full-fledged care, and not the educational process. It is until the age of one year that the basic habits of the offspring are laid on the subconscious tier, inclinations, personality traits are formed. Further ripening of the crumbs is mainly due to the educational process in infancy.
Conventionally, the annual stage of educational work is usually divided into 4 stages in accordance with the terms of the term.
The stage under consideration implies the formation of “correct” habits in babies and the prevention of the emergence of harmful ones. In addition, here parents should competently organize the nutrition of the crumbs. This is very important for adequate weight gain, development of habituation to the regime.
In this trimester, the baby should form habits such as:
- dive into the Morphean kingdom on the street without a dummy;
- spend some time in the crib, having fun on their own;
- hold the head;
- show displeasure when changing a diaper;
- fall asleep without motion sickness.
It is also recommended to pay serious attention to the hygiene of the crumbs. The morning at the toddler's should begin with a mother's friendly smile, carrying out hygienic manipulations, which include washing the baby's hands and face, washing, changing a diaper. These daily activities in the offspring will develop the habit of keeping themselves clean.
To develop the habit of holding the head in the baby, it is necessary to lay it on the tummy. Gradually, the baby will get used to the described action, the muscles of the neck and back will get stronger.
In order for the child to start gurgling, you should play with him more often. It is also good if the baby will hear nursery rhymes and children's songs. Any action directly related to the child needs to be commented on, told, for example, how to put on the sliders, change the diaper. When talking with a baby, it is recommended to smile, because it is in this way that a culture of communicative interaction is laid.
In the next trimester, visual, sensory and auditory perception of the world develops. The stage under consideration includes preparing the offspring for speech. It is recommended to include musical melodies of various genres here. At the same time, it is better that they are euphonious and light: classics, children's tunes, modern motives. In order for the children to walk around, he began to babble, his attention must be directed to other sounds. He should be introduced to the surrounding reality, attracting his interest in bird chirping, the noise of pouring water, the rattling of a tractor.
The mental formation of a crumb at the described stage should debut with communicative interaction. Parents need to play with the child, forming his perception. It is recommended to start practicing while awake, when the offspring is not disturbed and he is cheerful. The kid should enjoy such activities, so you should not play with the baby when he wants to eat or is capricious. At this stage, the laying of the moral and aesthetic foundations of education takes place, which the child receives as a result of communication with relatives.
Love and joyful emotions presented to the baby will become the starting point for forging a moral and aesthetic behavioral model. In addition to those listed in the routine, daily exercise and massage should also be present. At this stage, the exercises should already be more diverse, since the purpose of them is to prepare the baby for crawling.
The stage of the third trimester is marked by the restlessness of the offspring and his curiosity. Activity in babies at the described stage increases significantly. Since the child has already learned to crawl and sit down, and some kids are trying to get up, it’s time for physical training.
First of all, the baby must be given the freedom to move around the house. Therefore, you should maximally secure the possible route of his travel. In this trimester, babies are more and more interested in the contents of drawers and lockers, so it is recommended to remove any items that may harm the baby.
At this stage, you can already make the first attempts to teach the child to the pot. It is necessary to plant the baby on the pot after feeding, walking, sleeping. After some time, it will become clear to the baby for what purpose he is put on the pot. At about seven months of age, you can begin to teach your baby how to wash pens. Thus, the concept of cleanliness is formed.
Putting on bibs before feeding the crumbs, changing dirty clothes immediately after they get dirty, mothers instill neatness in their children. In this case, adults need to comment on each action and explain it.
For children, play activity is important, regardless of the age stage. Through it, they know the world. At the age of seven to eight months, you can demonstrate to the baby simple toys and manipulations with them, for example, to show how a ball is rolling, the wheels of a typewriter are spinning. Also, at the described stage, you can already show individual parts of the head: nose, eyes, ears. It is necessary to work with babies in the third trimester daily. Here you should also familiarize the offspring with the prohibition words: "no". For example, when a baby fights with play activities, it is necessary to say "no", explaining the reasons (it is unpleasant for me, it hurts).
In the fourth trimester, raising a child covers absolutely all areas of his activity. Here the baby actively interacts with the adult environment and tries to walk independently. When the toddler gets up on the knives on his own, he should be encouraged. First, the toddler needs to be helped, to drive him, holding two handles, then one. After a while, the baby will be able to linger, standing on its legs, for a few seconds.
The mental formation of an infant is based on instilling in him the skill of manipulating objects. A full-fledged educational process includes close communicative interaction with the offspring. You should constantly talk with the little one, but it is not recommended to copy children's speech or lisp. This can give rise to the formation of a speech defect.
How to properly raise a child at 1 year
Human personality, according to psychological research, is formed at an early stage of existence. Therefore, it is very important in the course of the educational process that the one-year-old baby gains the experience necessary for the future being, which will become the foundation of the relationship to the environment and the environment.
At this stage, the gameplay is the prevailing type of activity. However, so far, due to the age of the baby, it cannot independently organize its own leisure. Therefore, it falls on the parental shoulders. It is necessary for the offspring to show possible manipulations with toys, for example, how a doll walks, a frog jumps, a car transports. Role-playing games are also important, you can treat a sick bear with the little one or cook dinner for a bunny. However, the plots of the games must be primitive for the child to understand them well.
At the same time, in the process of playing leisure, it is necessary to closely monitor the offspring. The game will reflect the children's idea of \u200b\u200bexisting family relationships, the world, people. Observation will enable parents to promptly correct negative beliefs or destructive attitudes.
One-year-old understands exclusively visual-figurative treatment. Therefore, in order to convey some information to the crumbs, it is necessary to simulate the situation, based on fairy tales and taking as examples your favorite heroes.
You also need to constantly explain to the little one how to behave, what is good, what actions are bad. In addition, parents should always be a positive example, as babies always imitate their adult environment. At this stage of upbringing, parents should regularly clean, arrange things in their intended places, show by their own actions compliance with the daytime regimen and hygiene rules.
How to properly raise a child at 2 years old
In the period under review, the educational process should be different in relation to boys and young ladies.
The upbringing of a boy should include, above all, the expression of love in various forms: hugs, kisses, conversations, joint games. It is forbidden to hit the crumb and offend, as he can grow up insecure, aggressive, angry or distrustful. The boy must be brought up within strict boundaries, without excessive lisp, however, without imperious habits.
You should not limit the physical capabilities of the boy and his activity. It is normal if the baby will often walk with broken knees, because the future defender of the family and the Fatherland is growing.
In addressing the baby, it is better to use his name, or call him “sonny,” and diminutive forms such as “honey”, “bunny” are better not to be used. The kid should be aware with early yearsthat he grows up as a man and in the future will become the breadwinner and protector of the family.
The upbringing of young ladies must be directed towards developing creativity. Girls in comparison with their “antipodes” are more balanced, assiduous, calm. Monotonous manipulations are easier for them. They have a developed fantasy and a sense of beauty.
It is necessary to encourage the desire of daughters to show their own feelings, to compliment the young princesses, to bestow her with praise and tenderness. Girls should grow up to be confident, self-sufficient, and be able to recognize false feelings.
Babies should be given the opportunity to choose their own game. From childhood, little ladies need to be explained that they can achieve a lot in life. You can show them photos of successful ladies - doctors, politicians, actresses, explaining to them in passing that when they grow up, they can become equally successful and respected aunts.
How to properly raise a child at 3 years old
A three-year-old is a pretty serious test of strength for parents. After all, the baby has already grown noticeably, began to talk. The kid already has an active position in expressing his own aspirations. At some point, the baby's behavioral response and actions began to change dramatically. Previously obedient toddler turns into an obnoxious "bandit". This is how the three-year crisis manifests itself.
The most important thing here is a reserve of patience on the part of significant adults. Any situation of disobedience of the offspring that arises should be assessed extremely soberly. It is necessary to understand the feelings of babies and skillfully use children's whims against them. For example, when a toddler refuses to fold toys, but rather scatters them, then you should ask the child never to collect them.
In the described period, various requirements and prohibitions are ineffective. It is better to try to switch the child's attention to actions that are more exciting for him.
It is not recommended to overreact to hysterical seizures. However, it is also not necessary to indulge any childish whims. The three-year-old is testing the boundaries of what is permitted. How much his parents can afford. If you give the little one what he wants at the slightest, then he will have a habit of starting hysteria for the slightest reason. You need to try to distract the offspring from the provoking factor, to another interesting thing.
The educational process at 3 years old should be based on consistency. If mom has forbidden the baby to do something, then dad should not allow him to do it. This rule should be especially clearly conveyed to compassionate grandmothers and kindest grandfathers.
And most importantly, toddlers should be brought up in love. It is necessary to take care of the offspring, educate them, show the desired behavior by your own positive example.
How to raise a choleric child
A kid with a choleric person is tireless by nature. Nature has endowed such a crumb with powerful energy potential. From an early age, the baby shows his unbearable temperament, and relatives say with bewilderment: "Well, and character!" The task of the adult environment in a particular case is to help the baby grow in a measure of flexibility, restraint and compromise.
A small owner of this temperament is endlessly in movements, which are characterized by impetuosity, sharpness, as if someone is chasing him. Such a kid cannot stand long expectations, therefore, he is not able to sit idle in one place for a long time. The child's conversation is emotional, the words sound abrupt and fast. He does not speak, but chatters, swallowing words and syllables. Sometimes he is so carried away by monologues that he is unable to hear anyone.
Often he loses control over himself, starting to shout and argue loudly. Raising a child of 3-4 years old choleric is not easy. Such a kid loves adventure and risk. At the same time, the baby's susceptibility to sudden changes in mood throws the close environment into bewilderment.
A kid can easily change his mind at the last minute. You never know what to expect from him. He can behave outside the box in any situation. The kid himself often does not understand what is happening to him due to his impulsiveness. A child with a choleric temperament makes decisions instantly, his ideas are spontaneous, but often interesting. Everything new is quickly carried away by the baby, but just as easily he forgets about it in short term... During training, he shows abilities if the child is interested in the moment.
The little choleric falls asleep with difficulty and for a very long time. Restless sleep, depending on the impressions of the day.
The choleric person has a lot of positive qualities: fearlessness, riskiness, courage, determination, self-confidence, perseverance. At the same time, the tendency to stubbornness, restlessness, cockiness, conflict, impatience, playfulness, which gives parents certain difficulties in raising a choleric child.
Given that choleric children are emotionally unstable, their parents need to master the ability to control their own emotions. Before talking to a child in a fit or frustration, you need to stop, take a few deep breaths or count to ten and just think about whether notation and screaming directed at the baby will help in your situation.
An energetic choleric child must be involved in doing useful things, for example, at home. The kid must see the ultimate goal and the result of his work. Teach your child to say the steps out loud, then silently, and stick to your plan steadily.
It is very important for choleric people to engage in outdoor sports. This will allow you to release your energy, and training will teach you how to calculate your strength. Such a baby simply needs a living space, so you should go for walks with him as often as possible.
Designing, handicrafts, drawing can help to develop attention and perseverance. manual labor... It is important for parents not to show on the crumb if he is distracted, and each time to encourage the manifestation of patience and diligence. It is important to teach the kid to think over their decisions in advance, assessing the reserves of their strength, and only then proceed to action. Courtesy should be taught in any situations, since the spontaneity of the choleric person often hurts the pride of people.
It is especially necessary to pay attention to the ability to build relationships in the children's team, since parents will not be able to be around all the time. For the choleric, the problem is to impose leadership on other children. The second problem of the choleric kid is the desire for diversity, so constant friends do not stay close. In this case, it is required to encourage the kid to analyze his behavior, to deal with conflict situations with him, to discuss films and books. It is necessary to teach the baby to control his emotions, taking into account the interests of other people.
Humor will help in the fight against the bad mood of a choleric child. Show your child a way to release accumulated emotions: you can bang a toy, throw and hit a pillow. It will be better than venting your anger on parents and children in kindergarten... Breathing exercises can also help self-control. With the growth of the baby's emotional stress, you can use distracting techniques, for example, to interest him in something else and switch to this activity. Sometimes it is enough to just hug and calm. Adults need to observe as much as possible the behavioral manifestations of their crumbs and influence even before he gets angry or cries. It is forbidden to categorically tease a little choleric person.
