home
Flora and fauna
Mark Goulston - I Hear Through You (Short Version) Mark Goulston I can hear you through. Effective Negotiation Technique

Mark Goulston - I Hear Through You (Short Version) Mark Goulston I can hear you through. Effective Negotiation Technique

02.07.2023

Russian name: I Can Hear You Through - An Effective Negotiation Technique
original name: Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone
Cover:

Mark Goulston is a psychiatrist, journalist and business consultant. He is the author of the books “Don't bother yourself” and “Mental traps at work”.

publishing house: Mann, Ivanov & Ferber, 2011

Key Ideas

To learn how to convince people, first learn to listen to them.
If you want to convince someone that you are right, find a common language with him.
Bias and stereotypes should not affect how you perceive the words of the interlocutor.
Ask questions that encourage the person to talk about themselves, and listen carefully to the answers.
To overcome resistance and make you think about your arguments, the “impossible question” helps.
Ask the interlocutor to name something desirable, but not feasible, and then ask what prevents him from achieving this. By showing empathy at the right time, you can achieve the location of a person.
If a person is anxious and preoccupied with something, give him a reason to pour out negative emotions so that he can adequately perceive your words.
Don't try to hide problems that will come out anyway.
In some situations, the manager must be able to emphasize express gratitude or apologize to his employees.

Relevance

From the summary of this book you will learn: 1) How to find a common language with people
in hard situations; 2) How to convince people that you are right; 3) What effective persuasion techniques to use when communicating with relatives, friends, bosses, colleagues, clients, and even with aggressive strangers.

Even if you are considered the soul of society, this is unlikely to help convince a critical interlocutor. According to Mark Goulston, in order to convince someone to perform the action you need, you need to make that person feel your attention. Therefore, do not seek to arouse interest in yourself, but show interest in the interlocutor himself. At one time, the author of the book trained US intelligence officers to negotiate with terrorists for the release of hostages. Using the techniques and techniques described in the book, you will learn to overcome protective psychological barriers and convince your interlocutors of the correctness of your point of view. The author supports all his recommendations with memorable examples from real life. According to the site, this book will be useful to anyone who would like to develop their ability to find a common language with other people. If the author was able to dissuade a person who firmly decided to commit suicide from a fatal step, then his advice will surely help you convince not only clients, but also your teenage child.

Synopsis for "I Can Hear You"

Arguments for suicide

An armed man is sitting in a car outside the mall, threatening to commit suicide. The policeman negotiating with him clearly understands that there is almost no chance of a successful outcome. To find a common language with a man who has reached an extreme degree of despair, he asks him: “You think that no one except you knows what it is to be in a hopeless situation, and now you think that there is nothing else left for you, right?” The man thinks for a second and answers: “Yes, no one knows this and no one cares!” In such a simple way, the negotiator managed to involve a potential suicide in a conversation.
The question hit the mark, and the man answered in the affirmative. This was the first step towards a peaceful resolution of the conflict. Trying to convince someone of something, people often act too persistently. They operate with arguments and facts, but this only strengthens the disagreement of the interlocutors. If you want to learn how to convince and convince others, stop relying on logic alone. Start listening to others, try to empathize with them and feel their feelings. You can reach out to another person only when he believes in your arguments. To do this, you need to overcome his rejection, and then make sure that he listens, thinks about what was said, and eventually agrees with your point of view.
Understanding the levels of organization in the human brain will help you master the art of persuasion. Its lowest level, the “reptilian brain,” governs defensive behavior and controls the most primitive reactions, such as
"fight or flight". The middle level - the "mammalian brain" - is the receptacle of emotions, and the highest - the cerebral cortex - is responsible for logical thinking. The "brain of a reptile" turns on when a person encounters danger. The cortex of the hemispheres also reacts to it, but it does it more slowly, because first it needs to analyze this danger. If you begin to give logical arguments to a person whose “reptilian brain” has turned on, you will only be wasting your time. To find a common language with the interlocutor, you need to have time to win his favor before the defensive reaction works. This is the job of negotiators who deal with angry or frightened people. An important role in the process of persuasion is also played by mirror neurons - clusters of nerve cells, thanks to which people are able to adapt to others, empathize with them and understand their feelings.

To convince others of the correctness of your point of view, observe the following rules:
1. Learn to quickly suppress feelings of indignation. In a stressful situation, your body is at the mercy of a defensive reaction. After a while, you calm down and regain the ability to think logically. To restore this ability in seconds instead of hours, learn how to quickly move from panic to calm concentration. When you find yourself in an unpleasant situation, note to yourself exactly how you feel. The moment you call fear fear and rage rage, the logical part of your brain kicks in and you gain control over your emotions. Gradually, you will learn to calmly respond to situations of acute discomfort, and this skill will serve you well when establishing contacts with others.
2. Switch to listening. Our perception of the words and actions of another person depends on our opinion of him - often biased. For example, if the secretary forgets to hand over a package of important documents to the courier, you are likely to think that she is not doing her job well. However, you will change your mind if you find out that she spent the whole night at the bedside of her sick relative. By making hasty judgments about people, we fail to hear what they are trying to tell us. Learn to monitor your reaction to the words and actions of other people. Always strive to understand which judgments about others are based on real grounds, and which stem from preconceived notions.
3. Let the other person feel that you understand their emotions. When you empathize with a person, he stops feeling lonely. First of all, pay attention to the experiences of the people around you, and not what you want to achieve from them. Try the next trick. Tell the person, “I want to understand how you feel. I think you…” and describe his emotions.
4. Show interest in others. Most people want to impress others and try to get their attention. However, a person who is primarily concerned with the impression he makes usually does not listen to the interlocutor. Therefore, in a conversation, pay all attention to the interlocutor. Let him feel that he is playing the first violin. Ask him questions from time to time and listen carefully to the answers. Check whether you understood the interlocutor well by repeating his remarks in a paraphrased form.
5. Show people that you appreciate them. Each of us wants to be a significant person. Show others that you appreciate them, and they will trust you back. It's easy to tell the person you like that you appreciate them -
it is much more difficult to say this to someone who arouses your dislike. It should not be forgotten that the behavior of such people often has quite understandable reasons. As a rule, the people you dislike also want warmth and attention. Give it to them and you will win their favor.
6. Help people express their emotions. A frustrated person does not make contact well, because his thoughts are occupied with a problem that worries him. Help him to throw out negative emotions outward to feel relief, and then it will be easier for you to find a common language with him. Let the person talk. Do not interrupt and do not rush to give advice. Your task is to listen and from time to time ask the interlocutor to continue. To calm him down, invite him to close his eyes and take a few deep breaths. This technique is especially effective when dealing with teenagers.
7. Get rid of falseness in your own behavior. Your attempts to show your interlocutor your intelligence can be perceived as a desire to prick him, and ostentatious self-confidence as arrogance. The discrepancy between how others see you and your idea of it often becomes an obstacle
in search of a common language with people. To find out what others think of you, ask a few people whose opinion you trust.
8. The best way out is frankness. When you pretend that everything is fine when you really are not, it is as if you are building an invisible wall between yourself and those around you. Sometimes you need to show people your vulnerability. By doing so, you will find that most of them will readily forgive you for mistakes and offer their help. Ask for help before you really need it.
9. Avoid people who provoke conflicts. Sometimes we meet people who can only absorb other people's energy and demand attention. They are always dissatisfied with something, it doesn’t cost them anything to let a person down, they always find an excuse for their mistakes and in every possible way avoid taking responsibility. When confronted with such people, try to minimize their negative influence or completely eliminate communication with them.

Twelve easy ways to get along with people

In finding a way out of difficult situations, use the following techniques:
1. "The question of the impossible." People are always willing to give you a range of plausible reasons why you shouldn't do what you're about to do. The main thing in such a situation is to convince them of the achievability of the goal. To do this, you can use a trick invented by business consultant Dave Hibbard. When the interlocutor dismisses an idea as impossible, ask him the question: “Is there anything that is almost impossible to do, but if you do it, you will achieve tremendous success?” After listening to the answer, ask: “What needs to be done to make this possible?” So you will overcome the defensive reaction of the interlocutor and make him think - now he will not resist your arguments and will begin to think in the same direction as you.
2. "Magic Trick". When things are not going well for a person, he tenses up and takes a defensive position. Do not rush to scold him, but try to understand what feelings he is experiencing. Surprise him by saying, "I bet you're sure no one knows how hard you try and how much pressure you have to work under." Seeing that you understand him well, the employee will begin to agree with you, and as a result, the general tone of the conversation will change from negative to positive.
3. "The charge of empathy." There are people who like to criticize others. However, such splashing of negativity can hardly be considered normal communication. To stop a person who is carried away by the accusation of others, give him a "charge of empathy", that is, help him move from irritation to sympathy. If one person criticizes someone in front of you, invite him to put himself in the place of the second. When the accuser begins to empathize with the accused, negative emotions will fade into the background, giving way to a readiness for dialogue.
4. “Reverse charge of empathy.” This technique is effective in dealing with an employee who knows that he does not enjoy your favor. Its essence is
in the following: instead of making claims to such a person, apologize to him. List situations in which you may have been unfair to him. For example, you might say, “You probably think that I give you all the most boring work.” If the employee agrees, express your regret and promise to fix the situation. After such a conversation, the employee will return to work with fresh forces.
5. “Do you really think so?” People tend to exaggerate the severity of the problems they face. When the interlocutor shows strong anxiety about some problem, calmly ask him: “Do you really think that everything is that bad?” This question will make him look at the situation differently. In the same cases when a person believes that the problem he is facing is really very serious, offer him help in solving it.
6. The power of “hmm…” Dealing with a person who is very annoyed by something is not easy. The first thing you want to do in such a situation is to show retaliatory aggression or take a defensive position. However, instead of all this, try just saying "hmm ...". This simple technique will encourage the person to speak up and show that you are paying attention to their feelings. Tension will decrease, and the interlocutor will tune in to find a solution to the problem that worries him.
7. “Communicative Gambit”. Don't hide your flaws. For example, if you stutter, make it known at the very beginning of the conversation so that both you and the other person do not become uncomfortable. By voluntarily talking about your shortcomings in a job interview, you can explain to a potential employer why these shortcomings do not affect your professional qualities in any way.
8. From superficial to genuine communication. Most conversations between people relate to everyday trifles and do not affect their experiences. To establish a strong connection with a person, ask him a question that will prompt him to think, and then tell something personally about himself. For example, ask him: “If you had the opportunity to change something in the way the company works, what would you do?” or “Did you have a hard time early in your career?”
9. "Side by side." One of the most effective ways to find a common language with a person is to communicate with him when, for example, you dine at the same table, prepare correspondence for sending, or drive a car. Contacts of this kind are conducive to a sincere conversation. Use these situations to get to know your interlocutor better. This method is also effective in communication between parents and children.
10. Filling in the gaps. Any experienced sales professional knows that a conversation with a customer should not be turned into an interrogation. Invite the interlocutor to “fill in the gaps” in the conversation. For example, say to the client: “You are going to buy our software package because…”, and then invite him to complete the sentence himself. The client will thus be able to explain in his own words what he really needs.
11. “Is “no” really a “no”? If you have not heard a decisive and unequivocal refusal from the client, then perhaps all is not lost. In the business world, “no” sometimes means “maybe,” so always have a clarifying question ready. For example, if a potential client says that he is not interested in your company's products, try asking him: “Maybe I was too insistent ... Did I miss something important for you?” This will re-engage him in the conversation, and you will have a chance to get him to agree.
12. Emphasized expression of gratitude or regret. In some situations, more than just a “thank you” is required of us. To do this, thank the employee in the presence of colleagues, issue a written thanks or give a gift. Let people know that you appreciate their efforts and that their work means a lot to you. There are also situations that require a special approach to expressing regret (for example, in cases where a simple “sorry” will not be enough). This approach consists of the steps of showing remorse, correcting the mistake, restoring trust, and asking for forgiveness.

Estimates for the book from the site site

Buy a book in the online store

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the copyright holders.

Legal support of the publishing house is provided by the law firm "VegasLex"

This book is well complemented by:

Radislav Gandapas"Kama Sutra for the speaker"

Stuart Diamond"Negotiations that work"

Stephanie Palmer"I came, I saw, I convinced"

Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron Macmillan, Al Switzler"Key Negotiations"

Warren Bennis, teacher and friend.

It was thanks to you that I realized that if you listen carefully to people, try to understand exactly what they want, and help them to the best of your ability, then they will allow themselves to be persuaded into almost anything.

In memory of Edwin Shneidman, pioneer in suicide research and prevention, founder of the Los Angeles Suicide Prevention Center, and my esteemed mentor.

“If you listen, you can always hear the pain, fear, suffering, hopes and dreams of others. And if people feel that you are listening and understanding, they will open their minds and hearts to you” (Edwin Shneidman).

To my readers.

Glad to be able to give you these important lessons.

Foreword

CEOs, CEOs, and sales managers often say, “Talking to this person is like banging your forehead against a stone wall.”

When I hear this, I answer: “Stop. Look for the weakest stone in this wall." Find this "stone" - what a person really needs from you, and you will be able to overcome the highest barriers and communicate with people in a way that you could not even dream of before.

These thoughts lead me to my friend and colleague Mark Goulston. Mark has an almost magical ability to win over anyone: CEOs, managers, clients, patients, their families, and even hostage-takers, because he always finds the “weak stone.” Mark is a true genius at dealing with the most unsociable people, and in this book you will find all the secrets of how he succeeds.

I met Mark through his books Get Out of Your Own Way and Get Out of Your Own Way at Work. His books, his work and, more importantly, Mark himself impressed me so much that I got us to become business partners. Mark is now one of the intellectual leaders of Ferrazzi Greenlight and my trusted advisor. After watching him work for a long time, I can explain why everyone, from the FBI to Oprah Winfrey, listens when Mark talks about how to convince people, his methods are so simple and effective.

And by the way, don't focus on the fact that Mark is a psychiatrist. In addition, he is also one of the best business communicators I have ever met. Bring him to an office where everyone is at war with everyone, or to a sales department that can't get the attention of customers, and Mark will solve the problem quickly and in a way that everyone benefits from.

If you want to achieve the same success, you will not find a better teacher than Mark. He's brilliant, funny, kind, and captivating, and his stories, from Sunday uninvited guests to high-profile politicians, can not only entertain you, but change your life. So enjoy and start using new skills to turn impossible, uncommunicative, hard-nosed people into your allies, loyal customers, loyal colleagues and friends.

Keith Ferrazzi

Part one

Secrets of Persuasion

Some lucky people seem to have a magic wand when it comes to persuading other people to take part in their plans, achieve their goals and fulfill their desires. But in fact, persuading people is not magic. It's an art... and a science. And it's easier than you think.

Who is holding you hostage?

Good management is the art of making problems so interesting and their solutions so constructive that everyone wants to take part in working on them.

Paul Hocken. "Natural Capitalism"

There are always people in your life that you need to convince of something. If this fails, you lose your temper. It could be someone at work—a subordinate, a member of your team, a client, or a boss. Or someone close - a spouse, parent, child, or an embittered "former".

You've tried everything: logic, persuasion, strength, pleading, anger, but every time it's like you hit a wall. You lose your head, are scared or frustrated and think: “What will happen next?”.

I would like you to think of this situation as a hostage situation. Why? Because you can't get free. You have been captured - because of resistance, fear, apathy, stubbornness, selfishness or the desires of another person, and also because of your own inability to take effective action.

It is at this moment that I appear.

I am an ordinary person - husband, father, doctor. But a long time ago I discovered a special talent in myself. You can throw me into any situation and I can convince people. I can convince tough managers and angry workers that they need to work together to solve problems. I can get the attention of families that are falling apart and couples that have come to hate each other. I can even change the minds of people who have taken hostages or are about to commit suicide.

I wasn't sure at first that I was doing something different from what everyone else was doing, but I had no doubt that it worked. I knew that I was no smarter than others, but I realized that this success is not just luck: my approach has always worked, with completely different types of people, in completely different situations. One thing was not clear to me: why does it work?

Analyzing my methods, I found the answer. It turned out that I had stumbled upon a simple set of techniques (some I had discovered myself, and some I had borrowed from my teachers and colleagues) that ensured success. The common feature of these techniques was that they attracted people to me, even if they tried to distance themselves from me.

To understand this, imagine that you have to drive your car up a steep hill. If you try to do this at high speed, the wheels will spin, and the car will not obey the steering wheel. But one has only to downshift - and get full control. You seem to be pulling the road towards you.

Most people, trying to convince others, shift into high gears. They convince. They push. They are arguing. And thus create resistance. If you start using the techniques I offer, you will get exactly the opposite - you will listen, ask, repeat and mirror what you heard. When you do this, your opponents will understand that they are seen, understood and felt. And this unexpected downshift will lead them to you.

The powerful techniques you'll learn about in this book can shift people's minds from "no" to "yes" easily and quickly, often in minutes. I use these techniques every day—to help couples on the verge of divorce, companies on the verge of bankruptcy, management teams unable to effectively collaborate, and salespeople to help them make the “impossible” sales. I use them to help FBI agents and negotiators succeed in the toughest life-and-death situations when releasing hostages.

Mark Goulston

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without the written permission of the copyright holders.

Legal support of the publishing house is provided by the law firm "VegasLex"

© Mark Goulston, 2009. Published by AMACOM, a division of the American Management Association, International, New York. All rights reserved.

© Translation into Russian, edition in Russian, design. OOO "Mann, Ivanov and Ferber", 2010

This book is well complemented by:

Radislav Gandapas"Kama Sutra for the speaker"

Stuart Diamond"Negotiations that work"

Stephanie Palmer"I came, I saw, I convinced"

Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron Macmillan, Al Switzler"Key Negotiations"

Warren Bennis, teacher and friend.

It was thanks to you that I realized that if you listen carefully to people, try to understand exactly what they want, and help them to the best of your ability, then they will allow themselves to be persuaded into almost anything.

In memory of Edwin Shneidman, pioneer in suicide research and prevention, founder of the Los Angeles Suicide Prevention Center, and my esteemed mentor.

“If you listen, you can always hear the pain, fear, suffering, hopes and dreams of others. And if people feel that you are listening and understanding, they will open their minds and hearts to you” (Edwin Shneidman).

To my readers.

Glad to be able to give you these important lessons.

Foreword

CEO (English chief executive officer) - the highest official of the company (general director, chairman of the board, head). Determines the overall strategy of the enterprise, makes decisions at the highest level, performs representative duties. Note. ed.

CTO (English chief technical officer, or chief technology officer, - “technical director”) is a managerial position in Western companies, corresponding to the Russian “chief engineer”. One of the leaders of the corporation, responsible for its development and development of new products; CTO is usually responsible for the entire technological part of production. Note. ed.

Daniel Goleman, "Emotional Intelligence", AST, AST Moscow, Guardian, 2008

Par - in golf: the number of strokes required by an experienced player to advance to the next hole. Note. ed.

UCLA (University of California, Los Angeles) - University of California at Los Angeles. Note. ed.

Warren Bennis, teacher and friend.

In memory of Edwin Shneidman, pioneer in suicide research and prevention, founder of the Los Angeles Suicide Prevention Center, and my esteemed mentor.

To my readers.

Glad to be able to give you these important lessons.

Foreword

CEOs, CEOs, and sales managers often say, "Talking to this person is like banging your forehead against a stone wall."

I met Mark through his books Get Out of Your Own Way and Get Out of Your Own Way at Work. His books, his work and, more importantly, Mark himself impressed me so much that I got us to become business partners. Mark is now one of the intellectual leaders of Ferrazzi Greenlight and my trusted advisor. After watching him work for a long time, I can explain why everyone - from the FBI to Oprah Winfrey - listens when Mark talks about how to convince people - his methods are so simple and effective.

If you want to achieve the same success, you will not find a better teacher than Mark. He's brilliant, funny, kind, and captivating, and his stories - from tales of Sunday uninvited guests to speeches by high-profile politicians - can not only entertain you, but change your life. So enjoy and start using new skills to turn impossible, uncommunicative, hard-nosed people into your allies, loyal customers, loyal colleagues and friends.

Keith Ferrazzi

Part one

Secrets of Persuasion

Who is holding you hostage?

Good management is the art of making problems so interesting and their solutions so constructive that everyone wants to take part in working on them.

Paul Hocken. "Natural capitalism".

There are always people in your life that you need to convince of something. If this fails, you lose your temper. It could be someone at work - a subordinate, a member of your team, a client, or a boss. Or someone close - a spouse, parent, child, or an embittered "former".

You have tried everything: logic, persuasion, strength, pleading, anger - but every time it was as if you were hitting a wall. You lose your head, are scared or frustrated and think: “What will happen next?”.

I would like you to think of this situation as a hostage situation. Why? Because you can't get free. You are captured - because of resistance, fear, apathy, stubbornness, selfishness or the desires of another person, and also because of your own inability to take effective action.

It is at this moment that I appear.

Most people, trying to convince others, shift into high gears. They convince. They push. They are arguing. And thus create resistance. If you start using the techniques I suggest, you will get exactly the opposite - you will listen, ask, repeat and mirror what you heard.

When you do this, your opponents will understand that they are seen, understood and felt. And this unexpected downshift will lead them to you.

The powerful techniques you'll learn about in this book can shift people's minds from "no" to "yes" easily and quickly, often in minutes. I use these techniques every day - to help couples on the brink of divorce, companies on the verge of bankruptcy, management teams unable to effectively collaborate, and salespeople to help them make "impossible" sales. I use them to help FBI agents and negotiators succeed in the toughest life-and-death situations when releasing hostages.

In fact, as you'll see later, you have a lot in common with negotiators when it comes to getting in touch with people who don't want to listen to you. That is why the book begins with Frank's story.

Frank is sitting in a car in the parking lot of a large shopping mall. There is no one around him because he is holding the muzzle of a shotgun to his throat. The SWAT team and the negotiating team have already been called in. The SWAT team arrives and positions themselves behind the vehicles, trying to stay out of Frank's eyes.

While the negotiators are waiting, information about Frank is being collected. In his early thirties, he worked in the customer service department of a large electronics store, but lost his job six months ago because he was rude to customers and colleagues and even yelled. Frank went through several job interviews but never found one. He has a wife and two small children, and there were often scandals in the house.

A month ago, the wife took the children and went to her parents in another city, saying that she needed to take a break in the relationship, and he needed to think about his behavior. At the same time, Frank is kicked out of his apartment because he couldn't pay the rent. He moves into a squalid room in a poor area of the city, stops taking care of himself, washing and shaving, and eats almost nothing. The last straw is the demand to vacate this room, which he was exposed to the day before.

The chief negotiator arrives. He approaches Frank and says in a calm voice:

Frank, I'm Lieutenant Evans. I want to talk to you. There is a way out of this situation, and no one will harm you. I know you think you don't have a choice, but you do.

What do you know about this shit? You are just like everyone else. Leave me alone! Frank exclaims.

We constantly need something from others, whether they be colleagues and clients, bosses and subordinates, children and spouses. On whether we can get it, something important often depends - a career, for example. Or at least a holiday spent according to our desires.

And every day we convince someone of something (some even get paid for it). And not always successful.

How, when faced with a blank wall, to break through it and achieve the desired result: get an answer, persuade you to do something or not to do it ...? The key to successful negotiations is the ability to listen and hear the interlocutor and the ability to understand what he expects from you. This idea, in general, is not new, but there are still very few sensible methods.

This book is written by a scholar and an experienced negotiator rolled into one. Mark Goulston, a practicing psychiatrist, tells how to develop the skill of listening and how to apply it not only and not so much at work, but also in everyday life.

Who is this book for?

For businessmen who need to negotiate and manage their employees every day.
For their children, who every evening need to find a common language with their parents.
For everyone who wants to be heard and understood and is ready to hear and understand another.

Why we decided to publish this book

Because the topic of successful negotiation is still more relevant than ever - despite the huge number of books on negotiations. And also because…

"Chip" of the book

Mark Goulston trains the best FBI negotiators. When such a specialist shares his experience - it's a sin not to use it!

There are people in your life right now that you need to convince. If you can't do it, it pisses you off. Maybe it's someone at work - a subordinate, a member of your team, a client, or your boss. Maybe it's someone at home: a partner, a parent, a child, or an embittered ex.

You have tried everything - logic, persuasion, strength, pleading, anger - but every time you seem to hit a wall. You lose your head, you are scared or frustrated. And you think: “What will happen next?”.

I would like you to think of the situation as a hostage situation. Why? Because you cannot be free. You have been captured - because of resistance, fear, apathy, stubbornness, selfishness, or the need of another person - and also because of your own inability to take effective action.

It is at this moment that I appear.

In the chapters of this book, I will provide nine ground rules and twelve quick techniques that you can use to move people through the Persuasion Cycle. Gain experience in their application, and you will be able to combine them so that they work in any situation in your professional or personal life. These are the same concepts that I teach FBI agents and negotiators to build empathy, reduce conflict, and achieve "purchase" of the desired solution. When you learn them, you will never have to be held hostage by fear, anger, indifference, or other people's hidden agendas. You will have all the tools to turn any situation in your favor.

Expand description Collapse Description