• Help your teenager find a career. How to help your child choose a career. When to start? How to help your child choose a profession

    07.08.2023

    /  Choosing a profession for a child

    Sooner or later, the baby grows up, and the path to an adult and independent life opens before him. And the closer the end of school, the more often he is asked a question about his future career. Indeed, choosing a profession is a very important and responsible step, and the task of parents at this stage is to make it as painless and useful as possible for their child.

    In this article we will talk about choosing a profession for a child and career guidance tests.

    How to choose a profession?

    Perhaps almost every one of us has a story about who he wanted to be as a child. Agree that not always a dream finds itself in real life. And the point here is not only about parents or opportunities: with age, the circle of interests of the child changes, what was interesting 3-4 years ago becomes boring and not so important. That's why don't be scared if your child seriously decides to become a bus driver or an ice cream seller in elementary school. Most likely, in a couple of years, his position will change dramatically.

    Most psychologists agree that children can seriously think about the profession from the age of 12-13.

    From this period, you can connect various tests that help determine professional orientation, and success at school in certain subjects begins to "give out" the child: someone is successful in the humanities (Russian language, literature, social studies, and others), someone in the field of exact (mathematics, physics and others), and someone respects the natural (biology, chemistry).

    Based on the abilities and preferences of the child, you can choose the appropriate profile class or additional courses - it all depends on your school and financial capabilities.


    How to help your child in choosing a profession? Consult with a specialist.

    Source: Job & Salary

    Life doesn't get easier. Nobody gives any guarantees to anyone in anything. Adults have finally understood this and look at their children with concern: how will you survive, will you not fall to the sidelines of life?

    What do parents want for children? They want them to grow up viable. Some - so that their children settled in life better than anyone else. That is, again, they were viable. And now mothers bring ten-year-old children to me for career guidance. But they themselves doubt: is it too early?

    Not early. You can and should talk. In order to understand what this thin lad tree is inclined to, whether adults are trying to incline it in a direction that is unnatural for it, whether they water it too often and “manure” it with their care, whether there is enough air and sunlight for a blossoming soul.

    WE KNOW BETTER WHAT YOU NEED

    Often, parents themselves choose a profession for their offspring and, it happens, do not listen to the opinion of the children themselves at all. How do they think? The child does not yet understand, due to the smallness of his years, how important it is to have a stable piece of bread with butter and, if possible, caviar. For this, the most correct thing would be to get an education that will give you a job in the office, with documents. And what? A stable salary and over you is not caplet. "It's decided! they say. Be a lawyer." It is good if the child does not internally reject such a choice of the parent. And if he is not at all inclined to such work? As a result, the daughter, who was forcibly pushed into the profession, grows into a lethargic lawyer, unable to read legal documents and unable to solve even the most entry-level professional problems. Women accountants often come to see me. They come when it becomes completely unbearable for them: dress like an accountant, talk like an accountant, look at a monitor with numbers and sit still for eight hours in a row. When asked how they chose a profession, they answer: “Mom said that this is a female profession and gives a guaranteed income.”

    When choosing a profession, thinking only about salary is rational. But not reasonable. Life shows that it is better to choose a profession not with your head. And with the whole being. And it is right. Because a modern person goes to work not only for money. He wants to enjoy his work. In what there is no delight, there is no sense in that (W. Shakespeare).

    TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT

    It also happens. A father and son come to counseling. Dad is ready to finance any project, as long as the child wants something. And the child does not want to want anything. He does not hear his father's words. Why does he not hear his father's words? Because the father speaks one language, and the son speaks another. Father - a techie, business owner, director of the company - daily in the struggle. It is expressed in terms of struggle: “You must enter the middle stratum of society. Without a higher education, you will only work with your hands, you will be surrounded by unintelligent people. You must cultivate responsibility, will. The train of your generation is going fast. The people on this train are happy, they live. They didn't waste time. And you stayed on the platform.” This is the look of a father, eager to bring his son into the people. Who knows, or maybe, "staying on the platform", the guy had a good look at the station and its surroundings - and this went into the treasury of experience? Then he will convey this in his work, in the text, for example. The main thing is not to sleep, but to see and experience. The son is clearly a humanist, he speaks Russian perfectly, accurately, figuratively, being able to express any thought, any experience (a rarity now is great!). The guy is aware that he does not want to think about technology and deal with iron. And his behavior speaks volumes about it. He plays the guitar in a musical group, leaving a technical university three months after the start of training. Father: "Well, what is it? If you play, play well! You have to rehearse five hours a day. Or don't play at all. I say: “How will you feel about the fact that your son will never be the boss?” Father: “Let it be, let it not be. Just to be a professional."

    Is father right? Right! However, he does not find a way to his son's heart. He cannot convey his anxiety to his son. It seems to the son that the father is hammering nails into his head (he speaks assertively, strongly, quickly, using abstract words: duty, responsibility). And the son "turns on the muffler." The son does not hear. But even the father does not hear the speeches of his son. The father does not notice, for example, that his son has a good speech.

    This young man puts up gentle resistance to his father. He never once said: “Dad, mom, I don’t want to study at this institute.” He obviously didn't say that. He showed this by leaving the institute. Put the parents before the fact. The son is eighteen. He will have to go to the army, but he is not afraid: "It must be so." The father is at a loss: “Well, why doesn’t he tell me about his intentions ?!” I will say so. The child must have the experience of resisting parents, the experience of arguing with parents. And it's good if parents give their sons and daughters such an opportunity - to have their own opinion, different from their parents'. And it’s good if the children are not very afraid to express it. The father is perplexed: “Yes, we won’t kill him if he says his opinion!” But the son thinks in his own way: “You won’t kill, but you invest so much! I'm afraid to upset you, but I still can't do it your way." At the same time, the son behaves relaxed and not in an adult way. While he has such an opportunity - to continue to be in every sense a dependent. With anxiety and help, parents create a soft layer between reality and their son. The son does not succeed in bumping into economic reality (it is what sobers up, makes him an adult): he lives with his parents. And parents are afraid: a collision with reality can be disastrous for their son. The father literally radiates anxiety and provides all kinds of help.

    How does the anxiety of these parents work in the soul of this son? The son understands the situation like this: “A little annoying, but safe. All the same, they will do everything for me, because they are worried. But you still have to get down to business." Well, the way is taken! Parents, let him make his choice!

    LOOK IN BOTH

    The child, although your own son, carries the genes of your other relatives, he is no longer brought up in the environment in which you were brought up. He is a man of another era. This is a fact of life. In order to more gently survive the period of choosing a profession, you need to start watching your son or daughter from birth. My advice: watch every manifestation of your child. If he likes to do something, and constantly does it, thinks about it, then these actions give him pleasure. These activities can become part of the future of your favorite business. Let's say, if your son or daughter likes to "poke his nose into other people's business", then you should think about, for example, the profession of a journalist, psychologist, lawyer. You can object to me: “But what about talent, literacy? Doesn't a journalist need to be able to write? Isn’t it necessary to have fives in Russian?” Answer: not necessarily. The main thing is to have something to say. The main thing is the courage and pleasure from communicating with different people. And in Russian, of course, a journalist must write correctly. But this can be learned in six months - a year, even after school. Why would it be.

    It also happens. A novice journalist brings his first material, and the editor rewrites everything in this material, every word. And after a few years, this guy already writes in such a way that his materials become classics, the next generations of journalists learn from them. In the profession of a journalist, the main thing is people and events, understanding events, and the text is in second place. There is nothing inaccessible if you like it. It must be understood that a young person, choosing a profession, cannot immediately attack himself with objections: “it is difficult to enter”, “to travel far”, “I don’t know such and such a subject”. Profession - for many years, maybe for life. Is it necessary to retreat from it because of difficulties? The inclinations of the child are manifested in the game. From a very early age. Here comes a child, barely hobbles - this is his first summer in his life. It was the first time he saw other children. If the baby comes up to them, looks into their eyes, touches their hands, face, it means that he is a person oriented. If he is focused on people, this does not mean that he will not be interested in plants, books and cars, but one can say in the affirmative about his interest in a person already at this young age. If your four-year-old son built something out of buckets, ropes, door handles, this something comes into motion when the doors are opened and he called the structure a system - freeze and do not breathe - you see a design engineer in front of you.

    Respect any repetitive activity of your child. It is the language of these actions that speaks his calling.

    Any profession is composed, like a mosaic, of different skills and actions. For example, the profession of a doctor involves compassion, the ability to talk with a person, possession of medical technical equipment, understanding of a person as a system. But the profession of a doctor may become attractive to a child simply because of some pretty example or for some other mysterious reason. Not everyone is capable of understanding.

    NOT LAZY, BUT RELUCTIVE.

    Man is a plexus of energy rivers. If one of these rivers is blocked (by adults - by no one else), the energy does not move on. What does a person feel in such a state? He feels lethargic. He's lazy. But, dear parents, there is no such thing as laziness in psychology. Laziness is a lack of interest in the subject (and hence talent). That's what laziness is. If you are too lazy to do something, it means that a person does not see the point in this for himself. He does not raise his hands to an interesting, it would seem, object and close his eyes. It means that your child is talented in another way.

    But what if the child shows interest in a profession that seems unworthy to you, not interesting? In this case, it is necessary to consult with a professional consultant. How will he help you in this case? A consultant psychologist knows the labor market, he understands professions and knows what requirements a particular specialty makes for a person. He can also tell you what the job market will look like in ten or twenty years (assuming life in the country is not catastrophic, of course). A counseling psychologist will determine your child's tendencies and tell you about it. Together with the consultant, you and your child will decide on the next steps: where to study better, what to focus on, what steps you need to take to get what you want.

    SO, LET'S SUMMARIZE

      Parents, keep in mind that dragging a bag with an unloved business is very difficult. Even if years, money, hopes of parents are given to this business. A profession must be chosen not only with the head, but with the whole being. Give your son or daughter the opportunity to object to you on the merits. Do not laugh at your child's choice. This sincere choice gives strength to achieve, which means it will bring him happiness, money and fame. The energy of achievement dries up if the idea of ​​achievement belongs to another person. In what there is no delight - in that there is no sense. The profession should give pleasure to the body, eyes, ears, fingers, the smell of work should be pleasant. Make observations: what the child is praised for at school, in kindergarten, what he is scolded for (what he is scolded for, this can also be part of his talent), what he does the easiest, what he wants to do all the time, about what he likes to talk about what he asks often. Consult with a professional.

    Ekaterina Morozova


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    What can you do, but a child who has just recently learned to walk grows up quickly. And now you won’t have time to blink an eye how soon he will have to choose his future profession, here he may need the help of his parents. Help can be of various kinds, but your participation in this process is important for the child.

    At what age should you think?

    Measure is important in everything. And from a young age, agitating a child to become a doctor is also not worth it. Yes, maybe this is your unfulfilled dream, but you should not impose it on a child. Yes, he is an extension of you, but he is already a completely different person and his preferences can be diametrically opposed.

    Let your child try everything at an early age. Children should be sent to various kinds of circles, but if the child did not like the dances and they do not go well with him, do not force him to go there by force, this can develop hostility towards them for life. Contact with the child and be sure to talk to him about his failures, you may well help the baby with good advice, support him. At the stage of trial and error, he really needs you.

    By trying different types of mugs, you and your baby will be able to find what interests him the most. An occupation that he will do willingly and with great zeal. Try to continue his undertakings, develop them into a serious occupation. After all The main thing when choosing a profession is the opportunity to do what you enjoy. And you can prepare for your profession already from childhood.

    If your child does not know at all and cannot imagine his future, but soon he will need to apply for admission, try with him to consider the advantages of certain professions, but not starting with material gain, but starting with the knowledge and skills of your child, with how he copes with certain activities, with his perseverance, with how he communicates with people. This will help, if not to choose a profession, then to direct the child in the right direction. You can also consider the most popular professions and see if your child has an interest in them.

    At an early age, children often want to be those who are an example for them. It can be a school teacher, or a cartoon character or a favorite book.

    What traits of character speak about this or that choice?

    Any profession, even the most simple, requires certain skills from a person. You should pay attention to this. For example, concentration of attention is important for a corrector, an artist must have imaginative thinking. It is important to consider these factors. It is best for a child to choose a profession where he will be able to reveal his abilities as much as possible, where he will be able to realize himself to the maximum and achieve the greatest success. If you help him with this, then in the future he will be grateful to you.

    Today, high school students are offered to take a psychological test for career guidance. Such tests are compiled by several specialists at once: psychologists, teachers, personnel specialists. Based on the results of the tests, the child is offered a choice of several options for professions at once. This will help him make a choice in the right direction. He will be able to choose the profession to which the soul lies more and begin preparation for admission. Sign up for a course or tutor.

    How can you help your child make the right decision?

    First, introduce your child to your own profession. Indeed, often parents want their child to continue the profession of parents. But whether he wants it or not is another question. And a good way to figure it out is to show him how dad or mom works, show his working day, all the charms and disadvantages of the profession.

    Mistakes in choosing a profession

    When choosing a profession, a child can make typical mistakes. Warn him of them.

    • Attitude to the choice of profession as a permanent one. This is not entirely correct, now people change their profession during their lives and more than once, or even change not quite their profession, but their qualifications. Your child will also face this in the future.
    • The prevailing opinion about the prestige of the profession. Popular professions tend to become obsolete after some time and may even become unclaimed, for various reasons. Including due to an overabundance of specialists in the market. You can always offer a child something related to a popular profession if he wants nothing more than this.
    • Fascination only with the external or any one side of the profession. It is important that the child has a complete understanding of the profession. Maybe he likes architects and the way their work looks from the outside, but from the inside this profession may not be so attractive.
    • The transfer of attitude towards a person representing a certain profession to the profession itself. Seeing how others treat a family friend who works as a photographer, for example, a child may want to be the same, but he does not quite realize that a family friend has such popularity because of personal qualities, and not his professionalism, even if he is good as specialist.
    • The inability and unwillingness of the child to understand their personal qualities. It’s hard, but it’s worth awakening in the child an interest in yourself and in your interests. Watch him from the side and, if possible, point out his abilities, what he does.
    • Ignorance of their physical abilities and shortcomings existing when choosing a profession. To understand himself, the child needs to develop and be busy with some business, where he could test his abilities.

    The main thing is to be unobtrusive in these matters and not put pressure on the child, give him some freedom, but also point out the responsibility of his choice.

    It would seem that your child only recently learned to pronounce the letter “P” and went to first grade, and now, the end of school is getting closer and closer, and, accordingly, the question “Where to go?”. It is very important to choose the right future specialty, because this is the most important factor in determining the future of your child and his material and moral well-being.

    The biggest mistake that parents make in this matter is imposing their opinion on the child and making decisions for him, regardless of his desires and capabilities. Do not forget that the final choice remains with the child, but you can only suggest, help decide, direct in the right direction and provide all kinds of support. Here are some tips to help you help your child make the right choice.

    1. Identify the subjects he likes

    Any high school student by the end of school life inevitably has favorite and least favorite subjects. If your child hates mathematics, but enjoys studying history and world literature, then he is unlikely to be a good financier. If, on the contrary, in philology he is close to zero, but technical problems click like seeds, then perhaps he will become an excellent engineer. And at least for a while it is worth forgetting about your desires, because studying and working in this profile is not for you, but for him. Let the child decide what subjects he is ready to connect his future with, and then choose a specialty from the spectrum of those associated with them.

    2. Use Career Guidance Tests

    Career guidance tests are a pretty useful thing. Offer a child a couple of these tests, and let him answer without hesitation - as a rule, this way you can reveal his true abilities. If, according to the result, he turned out to be a 100% “human-artistic image”, and at the same time he draws well, you should think about the profession of a designer or architect. If he is a “man-man”, then all specialties related to the social sphere will suit him. “Man-nature” will suit the professions of the food and agricultural industries, “man-sign” can easily find himself in accounting, programming and computer technology, but “man-technique” has a direct road to engineers.

    3. Give the child the opportunity to see the desired field of activity from the inside

    Suppose your child has decided on his desires, now your task is to give him the opportunity to look at the chosen field of activity from the inside. Introduce him to a person of a desired profession, give them the opportunity to talk, identify the pros and cons of a career in this area. It would be nice if your son or daughter gets into a company specializing in their chosen field, sees the workflow from the inside, and reveals for themselves all the pros and cons. This will help him understand whether he really made the right decision for himself. The further course of events can be of two options: either he realizes that this profession is not for him and changes his mind in time, or he will further strengthen his desire to become a specialist in this particular field.

    4. Select the desired higher education institutions

    When the choice is 100% made, you need to start practical actions, such as choosing a higher education institution. If you live in the provinces, then you should understand that the quality of education in big cities is slightly higher and the prospects for possible employment are much wider. Therefore, no matter how hard it is for you to part with your beloved child, you need to be able to let him go in time. If the universities in your city can provide the proper level, then choose among them. You need to take into account the reputation of the university among employers, the ability to enter the budget or the cost of contract training, the level of corruption in the university and other factors that are important to you. Choose several options to make sure and, if anything, not to be left with nothing.

    The profession is chosen, the desired universities - too. The next step is preparation for admission. In our time, admission to higher educational institutions is carried out according to the results of independent tests, and for some specialties - creative competitions. Be sure to find out what subjects you need to take, and if there is a creative competition - its program. Do not save on tutors - it is better to spend money now than to disentangle the consequences of unsuccessful savings all your life. Self-discipline plays an important role - explain to the child that now the realization of his dream depends only on him, and he needs to take this as responsibly as possible, giving all his strength to study.

    And most importantly - believe in your son or daughter, support them, help both morally and financially. Remember that there are no impossible goals, and together you will definitely achieve what you want.

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