Cleaning of toys excites parents both in itself and as part of raising an independent child and preparing him for kindergarten. What is the risk of a mother who does not involve the baby in putting things in order, believing that it is faster and easier to do everything herself? Psychologist Anna Bykova in her new book "How to become a lazy mom" tells what exactly "lazy mom" is useful for.
How to teach a child to put away toys? I get asked this question very often. In terms of popularity, the problem of cleaning toys comes immediately after the "top three" (potty training, problems with sleep and appetite). To be honest, I do not know of a single working algorithm, as a result of which every child will immediately begin to clean up after himself. All children are different. We need different approaches, different arguments. Therefore, I am simply giving “toy stories” as material for reflection and search for a solution that may suit a particular mother and a particular child.
Story one: what toys like
Kindergarten, a group of three-year-olds. A typical situation: they grabbed all the toys from the shelves, played and immediately threw them away. It never occurs to anyone that the toys should be removed. What for?
I call the children to me.
- Guys, do you like to return home after playing in the kindergarten?
- And if you stayed in the kindergarten for the night? If they forgot to pick you up? Would you like this?
- So the toys have their own homes, where they like to return after the game! Toys don't like being thrown anywhere and forgotten there. Let's all together return the toys to their houses, where they will be happy. Where do our dolls live?
Morality. It is easier to convey a thought to a child if you rely on his experience.
The second story: a fairy tale for cleaning
Sasha is three years old. With his imagination, it seems that even toys are not needed. A roll of toilet paper is enough for him to have fun. Cars drive along a snow-covered track, the track is a soft two-layer roll rolled around the apartment. “Oops,” I think, “again I didn't have time to hide the last roll. It's too late, you don't want to go to the store, you will have to use paper handkerchiefs ... "
And at this time a snow storm began. The soft two-layer turned from ribbon-like ... I don't know what it turned into. The entire floor is strewn with small pieces. Satisfied Sashka is lying "in the snow", sprinkling himself with "snowflakes".
It's sleep time. I ought to clean up before bed. But mom needs, not Sasha, Sasha is satisfied with the "snowdrifts". Mom doesn't like the mess. If mom commands: "Collect the trash!" - Sasha will object: “This is not rubbish! This is snow! Let it lie! " So, you need to convince the child that the snow needs to be collected.
- Sash, Santa Claus really needs your snow.
- Yes?! What for?
- It's May. The snow has melted. Santa Claus is hot. And your snow doesn't melt. Santa Claus will protect your snow from the sun. Let's shovel all the snow into this bag.
- Mom, - asks Sashka, already sweeping the scraps of paper into the bag, - how will the snow get to Santa Claus?
- How, how, - I come up with the move, - we will leave the package on the balcony. He will fly in and pick up.
Sashka carefully collected all the "snowflakes" in a bag.
Senior, Arseny (he heard everything) carefully asked me about the ethics of such motivation:
- Mom, are you cheating?
- No, I'm not cheating. I come up with a fairy tale for Sasha, and he plays it. Does anyone feel bad about this?
Morality. Any activity for a child will be more attractive if it can be turned into a game.
Story Three: Breaking the Problem Into Pieces
Sasha is four years old. I set a task for him: to remove the toys. He begins to whine that this is a long time, that there are a lot of toys, that he will not be able to cope, that he will be tired and that it would be nice for him to help.
There is such a mess in the nursery that even I had the feeling that it was impossible to clean up.
- Okay, - I say, - just collect the cars in this box now.
The task is simple and straightforward, and Sasha quickly copes.
- And now only cubes in this box ... And now all the soldiers in this box ... Well, now, it remains only to pick up the garbage.
Morality. If the task seems abstract and impossible, it should be broken down into concrete simple subtasks.
The fourth story: how many toys do you need?
New kindergarten. The group has just been recruited. There are several dolls, several hares, several cars, a couple of constructors. There are ten children who, in two weeks in the kindergarten, have learned how to put away toys after themselves.
Children quickly learned where hares, dolls, cars and cubes "live". Cleaning up after the game was easy. And then they bought new games and toys for the kindergarten: finger puppets, dishes, a "hospital", balls, more constructors, pyramids, puzzles, mosaics, animals, a railway, trains with trailers, loto, dominoes ...
I put everything on the shelves, according to the principle of each toy - its place. And in the morning the children came and swept everything to the floor. Not out of malice, of course, and not out of hooligan motives. They just play like that. At the age of two or three, simple manipulations with objects are more often used: he turned it over in his hands and threw it on the floor. The more toys there are on the shelves, the more sweat there is on the floor.
But now it was time for dinner. Children do not have the strength and patience to clean. They were able to lift the toys from the floor, but to classify and place them in their places is an impossible task for them.
Morality. There should be as many toys within the reach as the child can put away.
P. S. After that, I left the old set of toys plus the pyramids. And she introduced new toys gradually, as the children remembered where to put what. When I offered a new toy and told how to play with it, I did not forget to show her “place of residence”. Not without hints: on a shelf or drawer, I pasted the image of the toy that "lives" there. If the child forgot where to put the pyramid, he simply looked for the corresponding picture on the shelf.
Fifth story: the one who cleans plays
From time to time, not only new toys, but also new children appeared in the group. They didn't know how to clean up toys according to the rules. And some didn’t want to learn it yet.
- Yegorka, why don't you clean up? All the guys put the toys in their places, and you continue to play.
- I'm tired.
- If you are tired, sit here, on a chair, rest. As soon as you relax or get bored, come and help us.
Sitting on a chair is boring. But I don’t want to help. The guys put away their toys, drank some juice and went out for a walk. There are toys on the street too: cars, scoops, shovels, balls.
- Yegorka, why are you taking a shovel? What if you get tired?
- Yegorka, don't touch the car. Sit down and rest.
- Yegorka, what are you taking the ball? Then you have to put it back in its place, and you get tired ...
Egorka can't stand:
- Yes, I will not get tired!
- And will you tidy it up later?
- Okay. Take what you want, but be sure to return it to the place.
Morality. He who does not clean up after himself does not play!
P. S. At home, I implemented this rule as follows: if the toys remained on the floor after the game (this is stubbornness!), I put them in a box on the mezzanine and took them out only after a week.
P. P. S. A participant in my training for parents told a story about the application of the same rule in the usual format of a fairy tale for a child:
- Toys must be removed. I taught, taught my son to this, for two years we took the toys together, and then one day the son resisted: "I won't, that's all, let them lie like that." Well, okay, let them lie, let's go to sleep. And in the morning we wake up - toys are lined up at the front door, getting ready for the exit! Dima im: where are they going? "Look for new owners and new houses, otherwise it's cold on the floor." We looked: the racing car slipped by, pins and a couple of books managed to escape when dad got out. Dima and I went to look for them. It turns out that the concierge managed to catch the fugitives! The concierge was given a candy in gratitude for the vigilance. And toys now always sleep in their places.
I remember from early childhood that I perceived the request of my parents to clean up the room and remove the toys as a punishment. Therefore, I always did it reluctantly. Well, really - what could be more boring than turning your colorful and cheerful children's world into the most ordinary, unremarkable room? Fortunately, now designers have come up with a lot of original ideas for storing toys, so the cleaning process becomes quick and fun.
Tightening bags
Whoever came up with these bags is a genius! When unfolded, they unfold to a wide playing field, and then quickly fold with the help of a pulling rope. It takes seconds to put toys away!
Cushions
This idea is not only original but also practical. Soft toys serve as "stuffing" for a special pillow or beanbag chair.
Shelves and baskets on the wall
They can be very different - from shelves to baskets-pots, which, in addition to their storage function, also play the role of a bright element of the children's room.
Suspension systems
Hanging organizers, shelves, baskets and hammocks look original in the interior of the nursery, and also free up free space for games on the floor.
Space under the bed
Perhaps this is one of the most practical ways to store toys, which saves space in small rooms and a seemingly useless interior area.
Racks
It will be interesting for your children to put toys in such funny racks! Especially if you put children's things not just in boxes or baskets, but in named compartments - with different names, symbols or colors.
Organizers
The organizer pockets can be hung on the wall or on the door - they do not take up much space, they are easy to carry and they are indispensable for storing small items and small soft toys.
Boxes
If the area of \u200b\u200bthe room is large enough, toys can be stored in special floor boxes. Or even come up with an unusual design from industrial boxes, fixing it on the wall.
Reading 5 min.
Every mother wants to see her child neat and tidy, because this is reflected in adult life. How to teach a child to put things in order? At what age can you start teaching your baby to be clean? How to get a teenager to clean his room without losing parental authority?
How to teach a child to be in order?
How to teach a child to clean up after themselves toys? This is the main question for most adults. The answer is ambiguous. To begin with, you need to start teaching your child from an early age (2-3 years). At this age, the baby still considers parents to be the standard of correct behavior. Start by cleaning up your toys after a fun game. Offer to send cars to garages and animals to the zoo.
Be directly involved in sorting toys. By the way, it is important that all toys have their place. Let it be containers, soft containers, boxes. The main thing is that the baby can get and clean them himself. For example, a constructor is stored in one box, a car in another, animals in a third, and so on.
Another important point: lead by example. If you can find daddy's socks at home in any part of the apartment or mom's cosmetics occupy any open surface, do not expect your child to crave cleanliness and order. If you want a clean child - put things in order and keep them clean every day. For discipline, make a plan for the whole family for the day, week, month. For preschoolers, tasks can be depicted with drawings or pictures. At the end of the day, after completing duties, you can put a heart (plus sign, five).
According to age, there must be requirements. A baby at 2-3 years old is able to remove toys after himself (together with his mother, of course), at 3-4 years old you can ask for help in household chores (wash dishes, dust), older preschoolers can hang out a small to-do list. You should not burden the child with household chores, helping around the house should become a habit and not burden. The baby needs to understand the importance of a process that benefits the whole family.
Mom should not put on a show to get involved, as the baby will quickly get used to it and will demand all new scenarios. Agree, not every mother will be able to invent new, exciting performances every day. Cleaning should be associated with a daily routine involving members of the entire family. It's hard to understand why dad is lying on the couch and mom is torn between household chores.
If parents wanted to enforce order in adolescence, it will not be easy, but possible. Teenagers are very irritable and obstinate, so refrain from emotions. Follow the tips for a positive result:
- the adult must clearly articulate the desired action and result. For example: “Things should be put away for dinner”;
- turn cleaning into a regular activity, create a favorable environment (turn on your son's or daughter's favorite music, read an interesting book aloud);
- do not in any way laugh at the teenager and do not compare yours with others;
- get a puppy who will definitely chew on abandoned things.
In fact, making the crumb to clean up not only toys, but also things, dishes is possible only thanks to daily consistent actions. How to get a child to clean up after him, if the mother once prompted him to independent actions, and within a week she cleaned herself. The crumb is perplexed and misunderstood from your requirements. At the very beginning of teaching the baby to order, the mother herself shows (accordingly removes) how and where to put the toys. Gradually carries the kid into cleaning by playing.
To get a positive result, the parent is involved in the game: the son takes dirty things in a truck, and the daughter's dolls wipe the dust with magic rags. It is important that cleaning is not boring, but enjoyable.
There are many tips on how to teach a child to clean up toys, things, dishes. The most popular are listed below:
- from an early age, teach your baby to maintain cleanliness and respect other people's work. Agree, it's a shame when a freshly washed floor gets dirty with dirty shoes;
- do not teach to receive rewards for doing household chores. This method will definitely work, but are you willing to “pay” for each removed sock.
- the requirements must be age appropriate. Do not expect a cleanly washed floor from a 2-3 year old baby;
- You will have to be reminded of putting things in order, and even better to participate in the process.
There are also extreme measures to instill a love of cleanliness:
- warn the slut that all uncleaned things will end up in the trash after a certain time. It is important to reinforce words with action.
- Postpone the purchase of new toys or things until the moment when the room is tidy for, for example, 10 days.
Household chores have a profound effect on personality development. A growing person who has been in contact with household chores learns the intricacies of everyday life, learns to serve himself, and will easily find the things he needs.
Every mother who has found an approach to her baby knows exactly how to accustom her child to order. All children are individual, if one can immediately stop the game (reading a book, chatting with friends), then others need time to “reboot”. Be sure to praise even for trying to put clothes on the shelf, even if it does not seem so neat, but the desire to clean up increases.
Tidying up the children's room is not an easy task! Especially if the child is still small and does not like to help mom with cleaning. How and where to put the toys so that they are always in their place? How to teach a kid to put things in order in the room on their own? We've covered a number of ideas to help resolve these issues!
Many kids like to hide their toys under the bed, and as a result, there is a whole dump of cars, robots, cats and other items. Do not scold your child for this or somehow resist it, you can make storage under the bed convenient and fun. To do this, you need drawers on wheels. They come with many cribs or sold separately at furniture stores.
Perhaps these are the most democratic and convenient storage systems. In textile baskets, you can put the most common toys, from small constructors to large soft toys. It is convenient for the child to do this himself without the help of his mother, and if he wishes, he can move the baskets around the room.
This option is great for those with multiple children of different ages. It is convenient to place the toys of the younger child on the lower level, and the older one on the higher ones. So parents will protect themselves and their children, because many toys for seniors are not at all suitable for the little ones.
If there is not much space in the room, then you can organize the storage of toys right at the front door. To do this, you can use a soft textile or polyethylene organizer with pockets. Or hook small bags or baskets on the hooks and put toys there.
Retractable plastic containers are often found in hardware stores. They are convenient for storing tools, all kinds of things, including children's toys. The kid can easily put toys in them, the main thing is that the containers do not have an unpleasant smell of plastic, if there is one, then such containers cannot be bought.
Flexible and colorful toy storage baskets are not hard to find in specialty children's stores. Children will be happy to put their toys into such organizers.
It is convenient when the nursery has mobile storage systems that are convenient to move around the room. This saves a lot of time and makes cleaning more enjoyable and productive. Therefore, it is worth paying attention to wooden boxes equipped with wheels.
Any mother can make textile pockets, there is no great difficulty in this, and for this you do not need to be a seamstress or a designer. But the baby will always be pleased to put the most favorite toys in the "houses" that the mother made with her own hands.
Metal baskets are a classic option that will be convenient for both baby and mother. They are very light and transparent, they are not hard to handle and you can always see what lies in such a basket.
Magnetic holders will come in handy in a child's boy, there are always several dozen cars and robots that are in disarray. You can quickly collect them in one place with the help of small magnetic assistants.
Storing children's toys is an eternal and inexhaustible topic. Therefore, we found more
We recently found out. But the baby grows, his games become more complicated, and the number of toys increases. How to prevent toys from filling up the entire space of a child's room? How to teach a child to collect toys and put things in order? First, let's tell a fantastic story, and then give some tips.
In one dark, dark room ...
Somewhere in the distance a light flickered, there was probably a window. It was dark in the children's room because the shutters were down. Parents have not raised them for a long time. They just didn't come here anymore.
The entrance to the window was blocked by the princess's castle made of large cubes (or perhaps a stable). This treasure could not be touched, since each moved cube broke the heart of the nursery dweller.
Every time mother and father walked along the path trodden among the thicket of toys, they unexpectedly found themselves in a medium-sized mountain of books, which, like a glacier, slid from an overcrowded bookshelf. There was no sign of the glacier melting. The ice age reigned in the children's room.
“There are never too many books,” said relatives and friends, and took care of replenishing the glacier. Any library would be delighted with such a collection. Unfortunately, the child appreciated this treasure and did not refuse either educational or folding books, or even bulky panoramic books.
The Book Mountain gradually turned into the Puzzles Plateau, which stretched right up to the Kukolnaya Upland, and then, after the accumulation of Balls and Skipping Rocks, the room became generally impassable.
Right in front of the window was a mountain of stuffed toys, each of which aroused ardent love and none of which could be taken away. Benevolent relatives have been constantly enlarging this Everest of plush animals, bringing it to a record height.
Parents once tried to cope with mountains of toys. But if in other families mums and dads were slowly cleaning up abandoned things, following the principle “Out of sight, out of mind and away from here”, in this house the parents did not try to go so far with their daughter. She had a kind of sixth sense, thanks to which she immediately recognized when the toy disappeared - even if the girl had not played with it for a long time. In any case, it seemed so.
On this day, a neighbor brought my daughter home from kindergarten. When she rang the doorbell, her mother appeared on the doorstep. Her hair was disheveled, dust hanging from it, and a feverish blush covered her cheeks. She had a snow shovel in her hand.
- Hm-hm, - the neighbor cleared her throat and asked, - Are you all right?
“Now yes,” the mother sighed with satisfaction.
The daughter suspected unkindness and ran into the room.
Furniture, carpet, walls were now clearly visible, although the lamp was not turned on. The sun penetrated freely through the (clean) window pane. It was easy to approach him. Not a trace of toy mountains and book glaciers remained. The ice age is over.
The daughter stood as if struck by thunder.
- Where? .. - she whispered.
“In the basement,” said the pleased mother.
The fact that half of the toys have already been put up for sale on the Internet, she chose to remain silent. The nicest children's books were still on the bookshelf, plush toys and bouncing balls were packed in a bag, and four of their favorite stuffed animals sat on a pillow.
The daughter walked through her kingdom, which suddenly became so big.
“There's so much room here,” she said with unexpected gratitude.
- Of course! - answered the pleased mother. - And when you want to play with your toys, you can bring something from the basement. And then you put it back again.
According to the mother, this was a good plan. My daughter seemed to agree with this. Anyway, so far she didn't mind.
Creative clutter or attention overload? At a certain age, chaos can be the result of creative play, as long as it does not overstep certain boundaries - for example, the boundaries of a room. Older children like to mix their toys: their cars drive into the toy city, and a spaceship flies right over them. In this way, children discover new possibilities for play.
Smaller children find themselves overwhelmed by too many toys. It's important for them to be able to focus on a small set of things.
Tell me what you really want. Do you find the instruction “take everything in this corner” specific? Your child doesn't think so. Help him to take the first steps: "Put the constructor in the drawer and the disks in the cabinet." Such instructions are also important because they entail praise. You need to inspect everything, take a deep breath and say: “Well, you put the disks on the shelf, and put all the parts of the designer in the box. I am very glad that you now have such a nice and tidy room. " In pedagogy, this is called descriptive praise, and it has an unusually powerful effect. The more details are included, the more proud the child will be.
How to make cleaning easier. The more the child participates in deciding what will "live" in his room, the better he will remember these places. Chests and boxes can be marked with different colors. It's only bad if there are too many of them: an overabundance of toys interferes with putting things in order. So make an effort and remove the ones that the child no longer plays with. When you get them again, they will be interesting again. And you can get rid of them altogether.
Right time. In this case, rituals also help - for example, if toys are always placed on the shelf before dinner. The intervals between cleanings should not be too long, so that each time you have to clean not very long, and so that the child (and parents) feel their success, and not surrender to a huge pile of toys.
Right words. It is necessary to pay attention to how you suggest the child to start cleaning: if you, passing by, throw: “Well, take it away from you,” then you can just as well turn to indoor plants. The magic key to the success of cleaning is the correct sequence: first you need to attract attention to yourself, and then urge to put things in order.
Walk up to your child. Now make eye contact with him to enter his world: "You play well with the animals from the zoo." It is worth saying very specific things: “I want you to collect the cubes and put them in a box. And then you can play some more. In general, you need to formulate positively, explaining what you want, and not scolding the child for "constant mess." This does not change anything and only spoils the mood.
It's easier to clean together. So maybe you will put everything on your desk at the same time? And, having worked together, the parents and the child will rejoice together that they live in a neat apartment. And they will praise each other for how diligent they are.
